What is wrong with people? Do they have to be dragged kicking and screaming into the streets to see? Sheep lead to the slaughter on pretty words, forced through the fires until their charred bodies are all that remain. It hurts to give everything and receive nothing in return. Keeping one eye open while you sleep and constantly having your heart closed to keep it from being torn out gets tiring and fast. Why can't people be true and honest? Why do good people have to suffer for the falsities of others?
I now knew I needed help. Doing this alone...it just couldn't be done all by myself. I didn't have the will to keep this going. I had sworn up and down I wouldn't involve anyone. I couldn't keep both them and myself safe, but I would lose my mind if I kept this inside any longer. There was a small problem however. Who could I trust? My father? Surely not. He was still locked up for attempting to cut my life short, and I doubted he wanted to see me now, especially to pull him into a world that could only mean death. A friend? I didn't have many friends to begin with, and over my past weeks of self imposed exile I certainly hadn't made any more. Any way I looked at it I was certainly alone.
All thoughts of getting food to nourish my ailing body were gone. I needed to get inside, somewhere safe and away from prying eyes. Of course, no where was really safe, but I was headed towards my dorm room as fast as I could manage it. I could feel the shivers passing through my body, the outside now seeming far too large. There were far too many places for people to hide out in these wide spaces, and in the shadows cast by lights on buildings. I had never before realised how freaky and creepy campus was at night. I suppose that's because I never had anything to fear before, nothing truly scary chasing at my heels.
I bundled myself through the front entry of my residence, fumbling with my key to open up the door to the stairwell. I bounded up the three flights, emerging into the hall and knocking past people on my way past the lounge towards my room. I got a few stares, seeing how pale and skinny I was getting. Now I was never really a body builder, but I had a nice slim build, and a distinct six pack before all this had started. I figure that's why I wasn't dead already. I jammed my key into my door, throwing myself into the room and slamming the door behind me, turning the lock as quickly as possible. I heard a ding from the direction of my laptop and I perked up, swinging around and glaring at the device. That thing had started it all, had sealed my fate. I clicked the mail button, retrieving the email from cyber space and staring at the words as if I could perhaps make sense of them if I kept looking at it harder.
I had no idea what this letter would do to me, how it would certainly impact my future.
"I know you. Your circumstance isn't all that different from my own and I am guessing at this point you could use a friend. Do what you want this invitation, but I think I may be able to be of some help to you.
Your Friend,
N"
N....my new ally? An enemy in disguise? There was only one way to find out. I hit reply.
Showing posts with label blogs. Show all posts
Showing posts with label blogs. Show all posts
Friday, 11 May 2012
Tuesday, 8 May 2012
The Third Check-Point
I suppose the more I run, the closer I get to my inevitable end, the more I start to see the true world. The sheep so easily lead to their slaughter on only pretty lies, they have earned my pity. I am not running to save myself, but to warn you, to give others the chance I never had. I have come to the realization that since I became involved in this whole series of events, my time was limited. Mortality is nothing to be scared of, and I am willing to die. Perhaps that is why at this point I am still alive, staring up at the stars and taking in the beauty of our universe.
They were watching. I now knew it as I stared through the blinds of my window. I hadn't been out in days, but nothing had bothered flicking past my window. There were no shadows in the corner of my eye to warn me of my impending doom. The world just seemed to move past me at it's own pace, and I wondered if I was stuck, bogged down by my fear. People seemed to be concerned, knocking on my door, sending me messages, but I ignored them. If I explained what I feared, they wouldn't understand, and as I had read, it would just drag them into his construct. I moved from the window, pacing my darkened room once more, stuck within my own thoughts. I would need to move soon, being locked up was no good for the body, and certainly not for my mind.
I hopped into the shower, washing off the dirt of days spent thinking and nights spent fearing the worst would come for me. It felt good to be back to something a little more like a normal life. I wondered what had made me fall so far, take something that was just a scary story so seriously. There had been no indication that it was real at all, so perhaps I had made myself anxious for nothing. Hopping out of the shower and wiping off the condensation from the mirror, I wiped at the stubble on my jaw. Just how long had I stayed here, locked up with no chance to see light, not eating. I was certainly skinnier, and the need to eat had left me, but that only hinted at how hungry I was. Oh god...what had I done to myself?
I walked out of the bathroom, head reeling with the revelations that it wasn't anyone else killing me right now. I was killing myself with fear and worry. I pulled on a pair of loose sweatpants and a t-shirt, with a typical College hoodie pulled over top. I needed to eat, even if it was something light. I stood at the door to my dorm room, hesitating. I didn't know if I was ready to come back out into the real world. I had retreated so far into my head that I wasn't sure if anything could ever be right again. I hadn't been that deep before, even in my childhood, which as I said was less than desirable. It took me twenty minutes to work up the courage to walk out the door and lock it tight behind me.
Walking out of the dorms, I noticed the pallor to my skin in the half light as twilight sank around the buildings of campus. I walked towards the student centre, towards the successful completion of my quest for food. It took me a while to notice the increase in foot traffic around me. It was gradual, hardly worth bothering with until I was almost crushed on all sides by the hoodie wearing band. A white hot band of fear struck through me, and I tried to push out of the circle, but hands pulled and pushed me back into the circle. I clawed at these people, lashed out and tried to fight, but nothing seemed to faze them as they brought me closer and closer towards their centre, towards the biggest one of them all, face hidden behind a mask. It spoke softly, but the voice sounded like something I had never heard before, grating and unpleasant, but silky sweet like honey. This is what he told me.
"He is coming for you. He knows who you are, and you can not deny fate."
And then they were gone, leaving only the chill on my skin and a fearful sob on my lips.
They were watching. I now knew it as I stared through the blinds of my window. I hadn't been out in days, but nothing had bothered flicking past my window. There were no shadows in the corner of my eye to warn me of my impending doom. The world just seemed to move past me at it's own pace, and I wondered if I was stuck, bogged down by my fear. People seemed to be concerned, knocking on my door, sending me messages, but I ignored them. If I explained what I feared, they wouldn't understand, and as I had read, it would just drag them into his construct. I moved from the window, pacing my darkened room once more, stuck within my own thoughts. I would need to move soon, being locked up was no good for the body, and certainly not for my mind.
I hopped into the shower, washing off the dirt of days spent thinking and nights spent fearing the worst would come for me. It felt good to be back to something a little more like a normal life. I wondered what had made me fall so far, take something that was just a scary story so seriously. There had been no indication that it was real at all, so perhaps I had made myself anxious for nothing. Hopping out of the shower and wiping off the condensation from the mirror, I wiped at the stubble on my jaw. Just how long had I stayed here, locked up with no chance to see light, not eating. I was certainly skinnier, and the need to eat had left me, but that only hinted at how hungry I was. Oh god...what had I done to myself?
I walked out of the bathroom, head reeling with the revelations that it wasn't anyone else killing me right now. I was killing myself with fear and worry. I pulled on a pair of loose sweatpants and a t-shirt, with a typical College hoodie pulled over top. I needed to eat, even if it was something light. I stood at the door to my dorm room, hesitating. I didn't know if I was ready to come back out into the real world. I had retreated so far into my head that I wasn't sure if anything could ever be right again. I hadn't been that deep before, even in my childhood, which as I said was less than desirable. It took me twenty minutes to work up the courage to walk out the door and lock it tight behind me.
Walking out of the dorms, I noticed the pallor to my skin in the half light as twilight sank around the buildings of campus. I walked towards the student centre, towards the successful completion of my quest for food. It took me a while to notice the increase in foot traffic around me. It was gradual, hardly worth bothering with until I was almost crushed on all sides by the hoodie wearing band. A white hot band of fear struck through me, and I tried to push out of the circle, but hands pulled and pushed me back into the circle. I clawed at these people, lashed out and tried to fight, but nothing seemed to faze them as they brought me closer and closer towards their centre, towards the biggest one of them all, face hidden behind a mask. It spoke softly, but the voice sounded like something I had never heard before, grating and unpleasant, but silky sweet like honey. This is what he told me.
"He is coming for you. He knows who you are, and you can not deny fate."
And then they were gone, leaving only the chill on my skin and a fearful sob on my lips.
Sunday, 22 April 2012
The First Check-Point
Have you ever felt like you were dreaming, even though you were wide awake?
Things can't be real, but in the back of your head the mantra repeats it's self. "This is real. This is real. This is real."
There is nothing you can do to change what you are seeing, nothing will bring you back to the times that were so calm and predictable, for you already know. What has been seen, can not be unseen.
As I said, this all started with a harmless link. I sat in my room, darkened except for the light of my lamp. The click of my mouse and the tapping of keys was deafening in the silence of the night, but I was absorbed. It was impossible to turn away from. Next thing I knew it was almost dawn, and the studying I was supposed to do had been untouched. So much for the test I was supposed to have. There was something strange about this lore that my friend had sent me...it seemed to me this was far more than just the stories my friends laughed at as hoaxes. It must be real, at least that is what my sleep deprived brain was yelling at me. I decided to ignore it's warning and get some rest.
Class went decently enough, the test not as hard as I believed it to be. I spent the day out, laughing, partying, trying anything to get the topic out of my head. It seemed to be a small itch, always present, begging me to read and become a part of the larger story. Eventually I returned, the pull to hard to escape, my own curiosity a twisted and warped creature wishing to pull me deeper into the new found source of despair.
I clicked the link again, ready to delve back into what I now know is his own personal playground. The list where he can choose his unsuspecting victims from and draw them into his maze like realms, ready to strike them down once their usefulness has expired. I clicked, ready, willing to once again take the plunge....and there was nothing. Nothing at all. The information was gone, deleted and finished. It was too much. The laugh I let out scared me, chilling me to the very core. What was I becoming?
I noticed movement outside my window, and caught the sight of someone in a hoodie. Had they been watching? Did they know? Was it one of his followers who had been sent to see if I would once again take his bait and draw myself into his world? I didn't know...I didn't really care as the fear bloomed in my chest. At this point, there was only one thing I could do, one thing that would make sense to my fear hazed brain.
I ran
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